Things Fall Apart

“Your garden is coming along beautifully sweetheart”

Now that most of the trauma had subsided, it was time for Alex to explain a few life lessons to her eldest daughter.  First, she wanted to know how the first trimester was going.  They laughed about Lauren’s strange cravings and ridiculous sense of smell.  After the laughter, they walked down to the river…

“Lauren, it’s important that you understand some things about life my dear.  Sometimes things will not turn out as you expect them to.  Perhaps, sometimes, our expectations aren’t realistic.  I was very lucky to meet a man like your father.  Not every man is ready to jump into marriage, pushing it will only push them away.  I know you’ve learned this, but it’s not your fault sweetheart.”

She continued…

“Even at my age, it’s not realistic to want another baby.  Especially since those surgeons took away from me the one thing I had to make them.  That doesn’t mean I don’t want a baby, it’s just not realistic.  Be patient with him darling, love on each other.  Nothing is guaranteed.”

And with that, her mother left to board the seaplane back to the island, leaving Lauren with a heavy load to think about.

“Well…. how did it go?” Alex knows her husband very well.

“It went fine.  His uncle was very understanding of the situation.”

“That’s nice Larry.” she sighs… “You didn’t let your anger get the best of you did you?”

“I just told him about the importance of responsibility that’s all.”

Larry avoided Alex’s eyes and guzzled the rest of his 4th beer…. Alex knows exactly what that means and simply replied with:

“hmmm…..”

“Sorry nephew, you kinda brought this one on yourself lil dude.  Come on and get cleaned up.”

“Where’s your nephew young man?”

Larry was calm and matter of fact. He didn’t want to waste time.  Straight and to the point.  Secretly he wished Mike’s uncle said something stupid.  Larry has anger issues which become especially bad when someone fucks with his daughters….

“Who? Mike-mike?”

Larry just stared at him, his eye twitched as he thought about knocking this dude out for asking a dumb ass question.

“He’s around front. You must be that girl’s daddy.  Man-to-man, I’ve been trying to raise this boy right sir, he don’t listen you know?”

Mike’s uncle walked Larry to the front of the house.  Larry’s anger had built up to the point that he was starting to shake.  He was clenching his teeth so hard his jaw was sore….

“Mike, we need to talk.”

“Mike-mike, explain to this man why you ain’t wit ya girl.”

Alex could feel something coming.  In her garden is where she was able to do most of her reflection and connection to things.  Yoga wasn’t so easy now since the surgery…. She could feel her daughter’s presence before she heard “Mom, I need to talk to you”.

Plump breasts, lips cracked from vomiting, swollen eyes, baggy clothes.

“Mom, I….”

“You’re having my grandbaby Lauren”

Lauren began to sob, the hormones were part of it, but mostly the guilt of not being more careful.  Of being irresponsible.  Of falling for a man who would leave her.  Alex listened.  She let her daughter grieve. No lectures.  Who knows how long Lauren had kept this bottled up.  Lauren heard the back door open and rose to her feet.  With Lauren facing away from her, Alex could finally let out the grin she had been holding back, from ear to ear, her entire spirit lifted when she saw Lauren’s tiny little baby bump.

“Where is he Lauren?”

“I don’t know dad, he said he was going back to his uncle’s”

Dillon Dillinger had been head over heels in love with Lyric ever since 3rd grade.  Lyric hadn’t even noticed him until well into their sophomore year at the Academy (partly because LJ scared off any boy that even attempted to get Lyric to notice them).  I mean, she knew him, he was the quiet kid in the back of the class whose glasses were too big for his face, kept to himself and wasn’t a trouble-maker.  One day he asked if she wanted to share his peanut butter, banana and honey sandwich at lunch.  Lyric found this combination quite odd and thought “hey, why not?”  That gave Dillon just the courage he needed to ask her to hang out at The Bluffs, share their first kiss and ask her to be his girlfriend.

She said yes, Just a few feet away from where her mother said “I Do” many years before.

“We started so small.  Look at us now baby.  Look at us now…..”

An updated family portrait was long overdue. Alex couldn’t wait to get these on the wall if, of course, there was any room left.

Alexandria Mariana Oceana and Leo Lynx (seated).  Back (L to R): Lauren Estelle, Lyric Moon, Lawrence Lloyd Sr., Lawrence Lloyd Jr., Koi Alondra.

The Lakes family.

“You’re the elusive one. Gotcha.  Finally.”

“Daddy, what’s a miracle?”

“Why do you ask Leo?”

“Well, mom always calls me her miracle baby.  What does that mean?”

“Oh…. well, you see… all of these people, lots of people, they told your mom that she’d never have another little baby.  They told her that Lyric and LJ would be the last babies in our family.  One day, your mom and I found out you were growing inside of her.  We were so happy.  But then, after you were born, your mom got real sick.  And you know what?”

“Wh… what?”

“She got better because of you.  You gave her the strength to get better.  So two miracles happened Leo: Your mother risked her life to have you and in turn, your life saved hers.”

“Dude.. whenever you get sick, I get sick.  Please medicate yourself LJ.”

“Shut up Lyric, i’m fine.”

“There. Is. LITERALLY STEAM shooting out of the little bit of brain you have! Take the medicine dad ordered! Have mom make one of those herbal remedies.  Drink some green tea!  DO SOMETHING!”

“Shut UP LYRIC!”

Tonight was movie night at the Lakes’ home.  Leo chose a movie about camping, clearly still going to bat for his dad.  However after the movie, when the last three Lakes children were sleeping in their beds, Alex walked out to shore with Larry not far behind her.  As it turns out, she wasn’t falling out of love with the mountains.  The mountains introduced her to love, how could she?  Truth is, she felt guilty, she felt ashamed.  She was sorry that she was no longer whole. She was sorry for the pain she caused her family. She didn’t deserve….

“Everything feels so different now” she would often tell Larry not quite knowing what specifically was different. 

Larry didn’t know what to say other than he loved her, he supported her and she was complete to him.  In fact, without her, it was HE who wouldn’t be complete.  He’d simply fall to pieces….

He whispers…. “Who will put me back together Alex?”

Lauren wanted to be angry with her father but she couldn’t. She was too sad to worry about how he happened to be at the same cafe at the same exact time her boyfriend’s inner asshole revealed itself.  Instead, she confided in him.  She loved Mike.  She wanted to have the same thing her dad had with her mother.  True love.  But today was Lauren’s day to face blunt realities from the men in her life.  Larry explained to her that she was not doing herself any favors by waiting around for a man to marry her.  She was too young, too smart, too talented.  It wasn’t her fault.  After reassuring her, Larry reminded her that he would still snap Mike’s neck if he hurt her, but…. his focus now is on his wife (he caught himself getting choked up and took a moment)…

“I love you Lauren, you’re living your own life now.  I won’t always be there every time.  Be smart in your choices like your mother taught you and showed you.  We’ll always be here for you.  Even when magic-Mike decides he’s too pussy to spend the rest of his life with the likes of you.  Come by soon, your mom made pie.”

Tension between Mike and Lauren had been mounting as of late.  Lauren simply refused to stop talking about marriage.  She had every right.  Mike however was getting tired of the non-stop barrage of complaints from his girl.  Mike figured it was time to be blunt.  Not only was he not ready, he didn’t think he’d ever be ready.  He didn’t care if she “wanted what her parents have” or if this “playing house shit is getting old” or the “Mike pick up your goddamn socks”.  He was tired of it frankly.

“And if you can’t deal? Lauren, if you can’t deal, I will pack my shit and go back to my uncle’s until you can find something ELSE to talk about”

Unfortunately, Mike had no idea of the level to which he had fucked up.

Whenever Alex needed to be convinced of something, Larry could always count on his boys to back him.  These days they officially out-numbered the girls in the house.  Larry’s plan? To get Alex back to the mountains.  You see, Larry had already told Alex about the land he bought in the mountains for her 40th birthday.  However, since her surgery, and over the last couple of years she had forgotten.  They were approaching yet another wedding anniversary and Larry wanted to show her where they’d be spending their golden years.  Alex wasn’t so sure.  For the first time ever (as far as Larry could remember), Alex wasn’t immediately ready to jump on the plane.  She needed some convincing.  Perhaps she didn’t trust her health.  Perhaps she had lost her love for the mountains……

In any case, it brought poor Larry’s spirits down as he was left to wonder.

Wednesday with the Lakes.

The past couple of months were brutal in terms of recovery for Alex.  Only recently had she gained back full strength in her legs.  Being the wellness guru that she was, she took extra time to let her body do what it needed.  She healed with meditation, nature, herbal teas, soaks, the moon and love.

Alex is finally back.

Lauren was loving life off the island.  The air was so different on the mainland.  It was much easier to breathe. She had begun her garden, something she was really excited about and Mike had started online classes.  They made ends meet by relying on Mike’s financial aid (and random loans from Larry).  Speaking of Mike, while claiming he loved her, he still wasn’t ready for marriage.  Lauren was pretty good at reminding him that she wouldn’t settle for anything less.  But see, Mike had gotten comfortable with their relationship just the way it was….

The only problem seemed to be remembering to protect themselves.  Many a night things got so heated that Lauren and Mike didn’t even bother with the little square packages strewn across their bedroom floor (compliments of Larry of course).

Catching up with Koi

Since moving out on her own, Koi was able to sell enough  art to purchase her mother’s old home on the beach.  College wasn’t her calling, art was.  Well, art AND finding her soulmate.  She and Jeremiah were becoming very close  although Koi wasn’t yet comfortable with  the idea of living together just yet. He visited her every day after his shift at the bistro.  He had already fallen in love with her (and the cooking skills she inherited from her mother).

Alex spent her first night home in the arms of her husband, not wanting to let him go.  Larry let her drift to sleep as he teased her about her newly gray tresses.  Her hoarse laughs bringing him joy and heartache at the same time.  The gray wasn’t from her 40s, however, like his were.  They came from the stresses her body had to endure….. he kissed each one like she’d had them forever.

“Nice to finally meet you mommy”

Welcome Home Alex

Still very weak and under heavy dosages of medication, Alex has been given her discharge papers.  She is free to return home.  She will be leaving the hospital missing a very important part of her.  A part of her that grew and nourished five children.  Knowing that Larry had donated large amounts of his own blood to help save her life filled that void. Although she hadn’t quite come to terms with this she just wanted to see her babies and sleep in her own bed with her husband.

“Are you sure you’re ready?”

“I’m positive.”

Lauren and Koi were making sure the twins were fed and happy.  The two made their way to see them every day.  The twins had been excused from school for a week given the circumstances.  Lyric was particularly happy about the fact that their mother was awake and walking. They were all hoping that their dear mom would be home very, very soon.

After all, it’s almost Leo’s birthday.

Alex is making progress.  No matter how painful that may be.

With some encouragement from her big sister, Lyric decided to go see their mom.  Since Lauren was the oldest, the hospital was calling her for updates.  After Larry got into the fight with the nurse he received a 24 hour ban from the hospital.  Since he refused to leave, Lauren parked across the street and let her dad sleep in the backseat.  When Lyric got to her mother’s room she tried eating and finishing up her homework.  She told Alex all about baby Leo’s milestones, how her garden was doing and she even asked how to pay the bills.  She eventually fell asleep next to her mother .

Although there was no verbal response from Alex, I’m almost certain she heard every word….   .

The nursing staff at Newcrest Level 1 Trauma Center tried encouraging Larry to get outside and get some air.  Larry hadn’t slept in days nor had he eaten much.  The staff had grilled hot dogs today…. You see, what the nursing staff failed to realize was Larry had a very short fuse, made worse by his wife’s condition which didn’t seem to be improving.

The hospital administrator was sympathetic to Larry and came out to take him back to his wife, but not before Alex’s nurse caught an attitude that Larry helped her to get rid of.

Hospital security called Lyric yet again.

“We… we brought you some things daddy. Daddy?”

Larry did not speak but silently stood up and went into the bathroom. 

Koi went into shock immediately and dropped to the floor. The room started spinning for both of them as they caught a glimpse of their mother who looked dead to them.

Lauren almost held it together.  Almost.  She wanted to be strong for her dad, she couldn’t look toward the bed for more than a glance.  She tried so hard to keep it together…

But then Koi began to pray.

All the Lakes children were finally together.  Not much was said.  Lyric took the lead to explain to Lauren and Koi the status of their mother.  LJ couldn’t be of much help.  He had been locked in his room since everything happened.  No one quite knew what to say.  No one really stopped to think about next steps.  All they knew was they knew nothing.  Lauren was inconsolable…..

Koi finally determined that the youngest two should stay home with baby Leo.  They would take turns visiting the hospital.  Their father hadn’t been home in two days now so the oldest would take him some food, clothes, soap, toothpaste and deodorant first.  After making the decision, Koi didn’t know if she was ready to see her parents like this.  Lyric said hospital security called.  Larry wouldn’t eat and refused to leave Alex’s side.  They had to carry him to the waiting area during surgery.

Everyone was a mess.

“Calm down Lyric, start from the beginning….”

Massive internal bleeding.  Severe post-partum hemorrhaging.  Emergency hysterectomy. Critical condition.

“Please come, please come… they’re saying they don’t know if…”

Should have gotten to the hospital at the first signs of labor.  Mr. Lakes when did you find her? Why wasn’t the ambulance called sooner? She should never have gotten pregnant. Mr. Lakes?

“Daddy’s there, he won’t leave.  I don’t know, I’m scared…”

Low blood pressure.  Faint pulse. Labored breathing. She needs blood.    Sir, we need you to go to the waiting area…… Sir?

“PLEASE HURRY!”

“Don’t leave us. Please don’t leave us.  We’re not ready yet.  I can’t do this without you baby.  I love you.  Breathe Alex…. Come on….”

Yet another very intense labor for Alex.  Although she was quite savvy when it came to homebirth, she was still worried given her age and the words from her doctor.  Larry was afraid too.  Always supportive, however this time he insisted they get to the hospital right away.  Alex wouldn’t hear of it and said she’d have the baby herself. Without his help if she had to.  Larry knew it was just fear that made Alex snap so he calmed himself and followed her to the nursery….

It was the most beautiful experience….

Welcome to the Island!

Leo Lynx Lakes

Born at 2:58 in the morning weighing 8 pounds and 2 ounces. Leo is 22 inches tall.  Congratulations on your beautiful boy Alex and Larry!

Lawrence and Alexandria Lakes had a little fun with the photographer this time as they celebrated their miracle baby.  Called such because Alex’s doctor swore she wouldn’t have more after the twins.  These photos will soon hang on their walls as a symbol of making the impossible possible.

Baby will be here soon, good luck you two.

Alex had quite a busy day today.  Not only did she snatch the edges off the kitchen this morning, she also served up some sweet potato pie for the twins.  Quality time with Lyric and LJ was much needed after Koi’s departure.  This evening she put the finishing touches on her nursery where she tried out a very minimalist style that reminded her of the mountains.

A very productive day for Alexandria Marina Oceana Lakes.

New recipe at level 9 of the baking skill: Chocolate souffle.

And just like that, she was gone.

Koi is such a humble girl.  She didn’t want the big party.  She didn’t want the gifts.  She didn’t even want to wake up her dad who had been up all night creating a mobile app for Simsung.  All she wanted was her mother’s home made chocolate cake and a quiet birthday.  Graduation came and went quietly.  Just the way Koi wanted.  Now, at the age of 18, she is ready to move out into the world….

Why in the world would Larry be out jogging in The Springs? Clearly, he has a sixth sense for these things…..

FINALLY!

Koi met a boy.  Jeremiah is his name.   Koi could not be more happy.

Well done Koi, well done.

Lauren was putting the pressure on Mike.  What she wanted was a ring and Mike was clearly not ready. They weren’t even out of college yet! In order to divert the conversation, he relied on his charisma and the fact that all it took was for him to flirt with her to get her mind off of the more serious discussions.  Mike was a bit jealous too, so flirting with her was also a means of letting the men in the cafe know to stay the hell away.  While all of this was going on, Lauren paid attention to a strange woman who came in staring at her man, and the wall…. perhaps she was trying listen in on the conversation.  Perhaps she loved the paint color.  Lauren didn’t care to find out and rushed Mike out of there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@maimouth Lauren’s new hair? LIFE.

Alex did not come to play. She came to slay. All day. Okay?

A surprise stop in a neighboring town greeted Alex as they returned from the mountains.  Larry had picked the perfect spot to celebrate and watch the sunset. Welcome to middle age sweet Alex.

Happy Birthday.

Lawrence and Alexandria Lakes will be returning to the island in the morning. On their last night in the mountains, Larry surprises Alex with an early birthday gift.  As it turns out, Larry wasn’t just helping the Ranger clear away brush and chop down dead trees. He was also purchasing the land that brush and those trees were on.  Larry made sure that he and his wife had a permanent home away from home in the mountains.

The gift was very well received.

Meanwhile, Koi, LJ and Lyric were enjoying having the house to themselves even if their mother called 37 times a day to check on them.  Lauren and Mike were enjoying being young, in love and free.  The two spent most of their time shopping, eating out and making out in public.

By their third night in the mountains Alex was back to her old self.  She swore to Larry that she wouldn’t let things get so bad again, especially when the cure was a quick trip to their favorite place.

That evening they discussed how Alex wished to celebrate her birthday.

The mountains served as the perfect medicine for Alex’s downed spirits.  Larry was aware of the healing properties of nature so he left Alex to receive its therapy while he and the ranger cleared some brush and chopped down some dead trees. 

It didn’t take Alex long to come around.

Alexandria is coming out of her darkness

That same evening, Larry booked their flight to the mountains.  He wasted no time.  One thing is for certain: Larry will do anything for his wife.  He’d sacrifice his own life if he had to.

You’re a good man Larry Lakes.

The kids weren’t clueless.  They talked about it in health class. There were hotline numbers hung on the walls in the cafeteria for people to call who felt depressed.  Even though they knew, it didn’t take their hurt away.  They weren’t used to seeing their mother like this.  They hurt.

Larry hurt even more.  Alex was distant again, her eyes swollen and raw.  He came to her in silence.  It wasn’t that he didn’t know what to say, he knew silence was healing.  Alex taught Larry that they can share energy without saying a word so he simply shared his energy.  They sat without speaking for hours until she whispered for him to “come here”.

He gathered her into his arms, she was limp and warm.

He looked into her puffy eyes as a hoarse and distressed voice, barely a whisper pierced his heart…

“Take me back to the mountains …”

Dark clouds moved in and hung low over Alex. Life’s inevitable changes have brought her down again.  So very far down…

Introducing Lyric and LJ; All Growed Up…

What may very well be the final two children to come from Alexandria and Lawrence Lakes have officially entered into a brand new stage of life. 

Happy birthday Lyric and Lawrence Jr, Happy Birthday.

With one child gone, one almost gone and two about to have birthdays, Alex finds herself in reflection most of the time.  Her husband is getting older and so is she.  She doesn’t know if she’s ready for a home without the sounds of small children.  She doesn’t know if she’s ready to enter her 40s.  She doesn’t know if she’s ready for yet another one of her children to venture out on their own.

What she does know, is that she doesn’t have any control over any of it.

LJ was having trouble with a bully in school.  Some big kid named Kevin.  LJ was really getting tired of this kid and asked his parents for advice.  Alex was worried and suggested talking to the dean.  Larry laughed and told LJ the best thing to do would be to beat the kid so bad he’ll return every cent of his lunch money.  Alex was not ok with this suggestion but once she left the table, Larry whispered to LJ to meet him in the backyard after dinner by the punching bag.  Everyone chimed in with their advice.  Alex overheard Koi telling LJ to “kick his little worthless ass” and promptly scolded her.  But no one heard Lyric’s advice:

“LJ, listen… we’re partners right? I know his sister, she’s in art with me.  Tomorrow, i’m going to tell her mom.  She picks her up right when we get on the bus.  She looks crazy, she has one leg, one eye and I swear a mouse lives in the bun on her head. I SAW IT.  You snap a pic of her.  Then, in photography class we’ll download the picture, blow it up, make copies and plaster them everywhere! Deal?”

Tuesday with the Lakes family.  Larry has always been Mr. Fix-It, he’s just getting much better at it!  He also hasn’t given up on his daily workouts.  Its a great chance for he and his wife to bond while the kids are away at school.  LJ prefers to get help with his homework from Koi.  He loves Koi, she’s literally the moon and the sun combined to him.  Lyric is still a daddy’s girl who loves her daddy’s stories even if she knows they’re totally made up.  Today was special however as Lauren showed up for dinner.  Once again the dinner table (that Larry crafted himself mind you) was full of familiar voices and new stories about life on the countryside.

Alex is still baking up wonderfully tasty confections, and Larry is still kicking the living shit out of his 40s.  Alex has absolutely zero complaints about Larry’s new found whenever-however-wherever philosophy.

Lauren, with a little persuasion, took Mike up on his offer to skip the dorms and live together. They decided to rent a little one bedroom + office in the vast countryside. 

Very meager beginnings for the young couple eager to get away from the island and city.

Meanwhile, back on land, Alex and the twins enjoyed movie night. Another really cheesy, straight-to-dvd movie night.

As promised, when Larry and Koi boarded the seaplane to head back home, he began the story of how he met her mother:

“You see goldfish, your mother wasn’t all that into me… AT FIRST! I was playing chess in the park, you know how I love my chess. Well, she sat down and just started moving the pieces around! Your mother couldn’t play chess for shit! I eventually taught her but I digress. We both loved the outdoors, I think that was the primary attraction.  I introduced her to chess in the park and she introduced me to sunsets at the bluffs.  And fishing! Did you know your mom taught me how to fish? She sure did.”

A smile crept across Koi’s lips as she closed her eyes and laid her head on  Larry’s shoulder.  She could feel the love in his heart with every word.

“Baby you gotta find someone who can teach you things.  Take you places you’ve never been.  But see, I was very persistent.  Thirsty as y’all call it. I mean I was blowing up her phone, showing up at her house unannounced just….”

They burst into laughter.  That gut laugh that comes with the ugly face and you have to catch your breath and wipe away tears.

“It was in the mountains where we fell in love though. We were in love with the mountains and, in turn, fell in love with each other.”

The seaplane landed on the water causing the familiar bumps and shakes that were expected living on the island.  For a moment, Larry and Koi sat, taking in the fresh ocean air.  Finally, Larry continued…

“I’ve been in love ever since.  We bought our house, had you guys and I still love her like that first trip to the mountains.”

Larry was finished. The plane grew silent and filled with Koi’s visions of finding a love like that and Larry’s heart filling with the memories he’s shared with the most beautiful person in the world.  The sailboat was on it’s way to break the silence and drop them off at the shore.

With her sister gone off the island, Koi tried to get out more.  This was one of the things Lauren had suggested to her in order to find the soulmate she desired.  Poor Koi, no matter what, she always ran into really creepy older guys in khakis who just stared at her.  She ended up calling her dad to pick her up.  Larry knew a thing or two about soulmates.  After all, he had spent many years with his.  Koi asked her dad how he did it.  Larry responded that he’d tell her all about how he met her mother on the plane back to the island.

And just like that, she was gone.

Lauren’s Open House: The Finale

As Larry and Lyric enjoyed an amazing desert, Alex slipped a birthday cake out of the back door and lit the candles.  The sound of the infamous birthday horn filled the air.  When Koi realized what was happening her scream of “DON’T LEAVE ME LAUREN!” echoed off the rocks and cliffs. It was time for Lauren to become a young and vibrant adult with the entire world ahead of her.

Lauren made one wish, the family sang and Koi swallowed back her tears as Lauren blew out her candles.  That evening, all was quiet and everyone helped to clean up, wash dishes and carry Lauren’s gifts to the basement.  Alex was the first to go to sleep, smiling and dreaming of the time when her big girl wasn’t so big.

Lauren’s Open House: Part Two

Mike, as expected, was trying to convince Lauren that they ought to get an apartment together rather than live in dorms.  After all, he added 500 simoleons to that suitcase of money from his own hard work.  Why not ask? But see, Larry was eaves dropping and sent Alex to run interference.  None of this mattered since Lauren hit Mike with the “I’ll think about it” before running off to pee.  Besides those shenanigans, Alex and Larry got a chance to focus on Koi and her plans since she was next up….

Soon, Mike had to go to work and Lottie had to get home to babysit her little sister.  They ran off while Lauren and Koi danced until the sunset.

Lauren’s Open House: Part One

Today the Lakes Family celebrated their first-born and her graduation, with honors, from Windenburg Academy.  They held an open house for Lauren Estelle Lakes and her closest friends.  Delicious food, lots of gifts and good times as Lauren prepares to enter into her young adult years away in college.